Gay Signals

It can be hard to finding another gay person. After all, as I've said before, feminine characteristics in a male, or masculine characteristics in a female, do not always mean the person is gay. However,I should point out, it doesn't mean they're not either!

Besides that, there are quite a few signals to be on the look out for. Like not wanting to talk about the opposite sex and seeming uncomfortable when their friends start checking people out. This is a good indicator that he/she doesn't quite get what all the fuss is about when it comes to the opposite sex. They may muster up a weak "Nice." or a head nod, but not really know what else to say.

Being in a situation where they have to see someone of the same sex naked, like a locker room or shower can be another big hint. Most people assume a gay guy is going to focus in on the genitals, however, I always found that the guys who are trying desperately to look anywhere else but the penis, are the ones who want to look at it the most! Most straight guys however won't hesitate to look. They're not afraid of what it means if they look, or what people will think if they look, so a little glace here and there out of curiosity is not out of the ordinary.

A lack of interest in activities typical for a person's gender is another good sign. Now as I said before, this doesn't mean that someone is gay, but it's not a bad sign either. For guys, lack in interest of sports, cars, roughhousing, these are things one might notice if one is looking for signs.

Some gay people tend to be a bit shy when talking about themselves. Most probably know that something is a little different about them. They're really not sure what to say or do when people ask them what they like to do for fun, or what music they like, because they're afraid it's not what most other people like. Guys may have a hard time admitting they like Lady Gaga, or the Twilight movies.

And of course, when asked what kind of person they're attracted to, or about relationships, things can be very awkward, particularly if the person is asking is not a close friend, or they're asked in a group of people. Even when a person isn't sure they are gay, it can be very difficult to know what to say to these questions. Often the person will give a very vague answer, or just throw out some characteristic in an uneasy manor, and then quickly change the subject.

Now one more time, I want to caution, these are just some signs that I look for. But they don't always lead to a gay person. Some people just seem to give off that vibe, but turn out to be straight as an arrow! So, it's more or less some things to keep in mind if you're trying to find some friends, or possibly more. But remember, even if someone is gay, it doesn't mean they've accepted it.

And as always, if someone says they're straight, or they're dating the opposite sex, no matter how many signals and signs you're picking up, you have to respect that they identify as straight. Until someone actually says the words "I'm gay" you have to assume that they are are not.

But it never hurts to get to know someone new. So if you think you see some of these signs, but you're not sure, you can always just start talking to them. Just be their friend and talk about ordinary things like school/work. If you feel really comfortable around them, you could even let them know that you are gay once you've gotten to know them. If you are open about your own sexuality, they're a lot more likely to be open about theirs.

If you don't want to be that bold, you can also play the scenario game (see last post) and let them know you're at least okay with people who are gay. This way the person at least knows you'd be accepting of them being gay, if nothing else. So if they are in fact gay/bi they may be willing to tell you. If that happens, from there it's just a matter of revealing your own sexuality and going from there.

It's a tricky little game trying to find someone who's gay, but over time we all get a little better at it. Then of course there is always the shortcuts like gay clubs. But I don't really recommend them. It's not a good place to get to know someone. But at least you do know most of the people there are gay. It's just not a good place to talk, so if you do manage to meet someone, they're probably only after one thing, and that probably means they're after that one thing with a lot of different people! So in this situation, needless to say, protection is a MUST! But then, it's really a must with anyone!

To wrap things up, just be mindful of people around you. Look for things that remind you of yourself, and you'll start finding more people like you who understand you, whether you're just looking for someone to talk to, or something more.

As always, thanks for reading and be sure to check back often.

Sincerely,

That Gay Guy,

Aaron

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